I have a hunch that people more or less act according to their values. The year is almost over and sadly I have achieved nothing so I think that I should try out some new values from now to the end of next year. Of course, I could just list out some vaguely nice-sounding values and call them my own but if I am unable to act according to them then that means that I don’t actually believe them. What will happen most likely is that I will struggle to remember even what those values I supposedly believed in were.
I know what I need to do to survive and prosper but every-time I set out to do these things my true values come to fore in the face of adversity where the rubber meets the road preventing me to do these tasks which will help me in the long run. To re-evaluate my values then I need a repeatable set of actions with each action explicitly matched to a value I would like to integrate.
I have tried to be flexible and write daily to-do lists but the problem with this is that I need to come up with a justification for each task every day leading to hesitation ending with a failure to act.
What I need then is a short memorable check-list of actions backed up by values as justifications.
What has led me to the point to need this kind of intervention in my life is that for the longest time I have been under the thumb of authority figures around me trying to force me towards a productive course. This worked for as long as their force was there to compel me. The problem with this is that as soon as that authoritarian force is taken out then obviously I stopped acting in a productive manner leading to another wave of authoritarian compulsion to make me productive but once that wave too eventually subsided I was once again left without justification to be productive. The only reason I was productive was not to anger those above me and in my lowest moments even just to make them happy. I hated above all being continuously subjected to the humiliation of being praised for being obedient.
With all that out of the way here is my latest attempt to stop being a total failure as a human being and, dare I say – although I cannot stand to be told so by another, as a man too:
|450+ Word Opinion Blog-Post||Openness to Experience||5|
|5+ Min of Physical Exercise||Low Neuroticism||5|
|500+ Word SoloRPG blogpost||Openness to Experience||0|
|5+ Min of Studying Aircraft||Conscientiousness||2|
|5+ Min of Cleaning my Room||Conscientiousness||2|
|1 Message/Call to someone||Extraversion||10|
Edit: 24.11.20. I changed the values in the Value column to the big five personality traits. The reason that low neuroticism is the same row as physical exercise is that my lack of self-esteem is correlated to my perception of the effects of my physical traits on my social status (with particular regard to my prospects of pair-bonding) or the lack thereof. Edit: 25/11/20. Also being physically tired leaves less leeway for my mind to veer towards unpleasant thoughts or any thoughts at all when I am tired and just want to rest.
Edit: 29/11/2020. I have decided to add a credit system which allows me to spend my points to indulge myself. Right now there is a lack of utility for the points outside of keeping track of my progress. Basically, by being able to actually spend the points I gather I hope this will motivate me to get more points to indulge myself further.
|Conscientiousness||3||One Long YT Video or ten short ones|
|Openness to Experience||3||Sleep for 3 or 4 hours|
Edit: 29/11/2020 Ideal day to-dos. A list of actions to facilitate getting more points without getting bogged down in the tables.
|Low Neuroticism||1 Hour of Exercise||12|
|Openness to Experience||Watch 1 Hour of Anime/LN/VN/WN/Manga||0|
|Openness to Experience||1 Hour SoloRPG session||1|
|Conscientiousness||3 Hour Aircraft Study||36|
Sharing The Load